My previous attempts failed to stay healthy.
Ive gained everything back i lost...

Today I started a Detox Diet, this called Detox 7, im going to do it in combination with Master Cleanse,, im not going to stop till June 30, this is so depressing that summers here and i gained it all back ..hmmmmmm

May Cleanse

I wont even go into yet but here i am being unhealthy again.
I will start on a 10 master cleanse tomorrow.
This time im going for 40 days.

I mean it

So far so good today, i promise no food, just need to work out for an hour,

DAY 5 --SPRING 08 CLEANSE

I havent posted in the past few days because i have been crazy busy with work which is good because its helped me stick to the cleanse, Ive totally lost my cravings and i feel great, im just a little low on energy thats all, also im having trouble falling asleep and i only sleep a short time.

This weekend im staying in so I plan on resting, sleeping, taking it easy. Also do some yoga as well and cardio..

I lost 3 pounds btw yay :)

DAY 2 Spring 08 Cleanse

Well I had such a busy day at work, finished my taxes last night and mailed it out today. I walked home from work since it was so nice out. Even went to H&M to buy some clothes, i brought some scarves and a blazer but i think ill wait till i lose more weight to buy spring clothes.

I had my juice all day at work, no cravings, so far tonight its not so bad, I have cravings but not as intense as yesterday. I'm sticking strictly to the cleanse tonight, its hard but i figure if i get by today and tomorrow by day 4 it will be easier for me.

I'm going to have my tea tonight, take a bath and call it an early night.
hope i do it tonight

DAY 1 - SPRING 08 10 Day Cleanse

Day 1-

The first day is always torture for me.

Wow here i am my second MC since February. In this new cleanse-when I blog I'll be talking about my emotions more- i think it plays a big part in my success and failure in this::

Day One-- i couldnt do SWF because i was at work early,,Was at work all day, wasnt so bad until I left work. I have cravings really bad..Ice cream, sweets, etc.. My biggest downfall is at night, I stay up very late doing projects for work, at around 1 am ill start eating sweets.. So im a little scared about it.
I drank almost all my juice already-might make another batch.. I had some peppermeint tea-that held me over.
Im just going to have to do this and get through the day, if i eat, i know im going to feel so depressed..
The weather is so nice out, its in the 60s. i keep my trenchcoat on cause im so uncomfortable showing my body..... I weigh 146 now... last summer i was about the same,, ive always been about 120. I cant go through another summer wearing a size 10-baggy black pants and fat jeans and long babydoll shirts to cover my tummy and hips.
I feel so low on myself and unattractive, im 5'5, I know it isnt that bad 146 but compared to being 120 all your life it is really bad.
The lowest I ever weighed was 110 back in 2003- i can tell you it was the best i ever felt and looked. People were so jealous of me they couldnt even compliment-those same people tell me now, "wow you look so much more healthy"
Alot of my weight gain has to do with a bad break-up I had also the stresses of my new job, i dont have time for much except going to work -coming home, staying up till 3 am working on projects-waking up at 7am-going to work--the weekends i mostly sleep--

I'm going to have to do this just for the sake of my happiness. I hope i really stick with this, this time..

Also after I reach my goal of 120, im going to have to come up with a lifetime plan to stick with.. I cant go back to just eating small portions without a real plan..

I guess your 30s really catch up to you,

If and when I get to 120 lbs, Im going to have to do something special for myself... Maybe a spa day.

UPDATE 3AM-- i was good but then got VERY intense cravings gave in and had two tablespoons of barbeque sauce.. Not awful but still, it shows i couldnt stick to the plan,,,---try harder tomorrow

Wow i failed on the Water Cleanse

I failed majorly on the water cleanse back to Master cleasne Monday

Hasnt even been a month and i have been pigging out, i gained 10 pounds back. I had a bad case of PMS,, and ate some bad food. went sour on my work out plan..

Tomorrow im going to start a 10 Day only Water-Tea Fast.. Then go on to the MC again for the entire month of april

What a way to live, well at least i catch myself,, my problem is i need to follow a plan, as soon as i stop a plan i go bad

Post Cleanse Day 10

I gained 5 pounds so far...

not bad but i have been eating low cal still, i need to lose 10 more pounds

Post Cleanse Day 5

So yesterday i had grapefruit, eggs, salad, chicken, spinach., barbeque tofu..

im still having the lemonade maybe once or twice when i get hungry.. I worked longer and harder today as my energy is coming back/ been drinking caffeine free tea..

Im going to keep journaling here so i dont go back to bad habits of junk. I want to stay away from bread, potatoes, chips, ice cream, bars, pizza, etc and alcohol too, im afraid to drink wine since i havent had it in so long.

Post Cleanse Day 3

I had a grapefruit, salad, steamed veggies and chicken tonight.

I brought Zip N Steam bags , this is really great, steams the food and cooks so quick, i love it.. I made my chicken and veggies in it..

The good thing is that I have a very small appetite now, i cant eat alot at all, just small meals

Post Cleanse- Day 2

I had a half grapefruit with flax seeds this morning and 2 eggs. I feel really good, no stomache ache and it feels so good to eat again,,,

im going to notvh up my exercise routine because i still need to lose weight...

Day 27

I decided to break the cleanse today. I just feel like I can't do the cleanse anymore and I really have the need to eat. Today I had the orange juice and I feel so much better.
So today I weigh 136,, seems like i couldnt go lower than this weight on the cleanse..So I lost 12 pounds altogether and 22 pounds all together since January..(January i was dieting and exercising)

136 used to be my highest weight some years ago until i shot up to 158 this past December. So I am happy I dropped all that weight and got back to a decent number. I cant believe im happy about being 136... I've always weight between 112-125. Right now I would like to get back down to 125, then I can concentrate on going lower.

I feel better about myself and feel more confident. I do feel healthier, I'm so happy I kicked my caffeine habit. Now I plan on eating healthy and exercising everyday..

Day 26

Well I'm so dissapointed in myself, i gave in last night and ate vegetable soup with some vegetables and crackers,, i didnt have alot and amazingly my stomach was not upset.... I think i went too long on the cleanse and should have ended it at Day 21... I've had intense cravings these past few days..I also didnt exercise yesterday. I had a very stressful day at work yesterday and I wound up working till 10 pm,, I didnt drink my LD,, i know its what caused me to mess up.. It scares me because the reason why i put so much weight on is because when I get stressed I would eat,, well Im going to watch out for it and try to control it.

I know I broke the cleanse but I'm going to go back on it until Friday then I will break the cleanse properly...i think its the right thing to do.

I just feel down on myself today and i also went up 2 pounds, im sure its water weight but im still upset.

I came home early from work, I exercised for 1 hour, gazelle and ab lounger... I'll have more LD and then go to sleep early

DAY 25

Well I feel good, just have cravings again.. no weight loss, fuzzy tongue..
I'll update more later not much to report today. slept very well last night

DAY 24

Wow I had insomnia last night, could not sleep,, felt anxious, well I slept for 4 hours and i dropped 1 pound, so I'm 134.0 now. I broke that short plateau i was stuck in, maybe it was that workout i did. I didn't even have a BM yesterday and i dropped weight.

I still feel good despite the lack of sleep, well lets see how i feel when i come back from work.

Update: 2 am, still cant sleep. well i worked out for 40 minutes today, didnt have as much energy as yesterdays work out but i still got a good one. I had cravings today maybe because im looking at recipes to make after the cleanse.
My tongue still has fuzz, thats about it and i do feel anxious, its weird, hard to explain...

DAY 23

Slept 6 hours, no weight loss. Feel the same, just feeling good. last night i has 2 BMs, Today I'm just going to stay in, take it easy.. I'm using limes from now on, I just like how they taste better.
My dark circles have improved but i'm pretty sure it because I'm using Hylexin cream from my undereyes..

WIll update more later

7 pm;; I worked out for an hour today, my gazelle and ab lounger, I worked out really hard today because i had alot of energy. I stayed home all day too... I'm doing fine, no BM yet, I drank 4 LDs already, 2 more to go. I did skip SWF, I honeslty dislike doing SWF because it bloats me. I like doing the lax tea better even though i have cramps, i had less of the tea than i normally would as someone on the MC board reccomended and I actually don't have cramps...

I'll take a bath tonight and call it a night.. I'm looking foward to eating again I am bored. :)

Also I notice on the weekends i dont have weight loss, but when im working during the week the scale moves down, I really think its from stress at work that makes me loose weight and also maybe all my walking..

Day 22

I had really bad cravings last night and i did cheat for the first time. I had some green pea split soup and hummus, i know its not that bad but I shouldnt have, i didn't get a stomach-ache.. I won't do it again.. I was up late, couldn't sleep, bored.

Today I need to get out, I'm going with my friend to the musuem today to see an exhibit. Shes pretty understanding to cleanses but still she eats alot, she lives in the part of the village near all these Italian Pastry Shops- very tempting.. But I'll resist, just need to get out.. Then I have to call it an early night cause I can't drink.

Had the LD this morning,,, I exercises yesterday for 40 minutes,, same weight-no change....
Not much to say today- no detox symptoms..

Update 2 am,, well today was a good day, good to be out, freezing out though in nyc. I got back home from meeting my friend around 10 pm, I worked out for 1 hour doing the gazelle plus my ab lounger...

I feel normal, no detox symptoms, i have energy but I must say I am really getting bored of drinking the lemonade, my only complaint now.. I'm really looking foward to getting through this week and ending on Friday because I feel boredom setting in.

I also took a detox epsom salt ginger bath tonight, was wonderful..

DAY 21

Made it to my 21 Day goal, Now I have a new goal of 28 days, I think its going to be easy.
Still feeling good, I am going to skip SWF and lax tea today because I had bad cramps yesterday from the tea and felt I had too many Bms, my butt is not feeling too good and the SWF did bloat me again, I went up to 135.5

I'm still ghostly white, the dark circles are getting better but i bought Hylexin eye Cream and I think it may be improving them.

I also brought some nice skin care products from Murad, I needed a new skincare regime,
I brought the Refreshing Cleanser, Night Reform Treatment, Night Reform Cream, and the Renewing Eye Cream.. My skin feels softer, Its an anti-aging line, http://www.murad.com/anti-aging-recommended.html
I dont have any lines or wrinkles yet but I want to prevent them, the only thing i do have is cellulite and I already spent thousands on treatments for that, I think the only cure is building muscle there

Other than that not too much to say this morning, I'm gonna go to work and I'll write more later!

UPDATE: I worked out for 40 minutes on my gazelle- i feel so good, i notice i smell like lemons now when i sweat, im going to do the ab lounger later tonight, so far I feel really great.

DAY 20

Yea I made it to Day 20, I feel really great today. Its so weird to think I have not eaten in 20 days and I feel this good. Maybe it took that long to detox myself. My tongue is getting lighter as well. I did SWF this morning because I had the day off.. Had several eliminations but like I have said earlier it bloats me.. Uped my LD today since yesterday was a water day.. I weigh 135 today, so i lost 1/2 pound..Cant beleive I was 157 in January,, so in total thats a 22 pound weight loss, but from the Master Cleanse I have a 12 pound weight loss, the other 10 pounds I lost on the Fat Flush Plan. which was good. If I get down to 125 I'll be happy. My normal weight has always been between 112-125 throughout my life..

One thing I notice, when I have Cayenne it makes me have a BM. I'll put Cayenne in my water and it speeds up the BM. I don't mind the Cayenne since I love real spicy foods.

I didnt exercise today, i should do some workout on the gazelle..

I decided to go to 28 days, since I feel so good, why should i stop now..

I brought some really cozy microfleece sheets today, keeping me warm.

Day 19

I slept last night for 6 hours,, Had alot of weird dreams..Today I'm feeling better. My stomach pain went down.
My tongues white coating i can see is gradually fading. I lost a half a pound, down to 135.5, so thats good.

I uped the LD the day before and lowered it yesterday so maybe that has something to do with it. I also didnt work out yesterday, just walked alot. maybe the working out is too much for me. I'm going to make today a water day only, see what happens.. I have the energy today to do so, well lets see how i feel tonight.. I look like hell btw, ghost pale face, dark circles. I could never leave the house without foundation.
I'm still thinking of going for the 30 days, I might as well if I come this far and its getting easy.

Ill update later when i come home from work:
9 pm-- got home from work, today i felt the best and had the most energy I ever had on the cleanse.. I walked for about an hour, felt great...And today I decided to just have water, no LD... I did a ginger epsom salt detox bath tonight, Its really great, It sweats all the toxins out. This time I lasted 20 minutes in the tub, it gets too hot for me.
My new goal is 28 days, so yes I will keep going to Day 28 ..
I just wish i didnt feel so cold and looked so ghostly :)